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-I think what I have found in business and management training, this is a rule I've had, I don't know if you would agree. But I've seen this a lot where and entrepreneur when you start a company, your number one goal is to be liked. I remember when I started the business my first employee I thought man this guy he likes me I like him. I'm trying to keep him happy all the time. And I remember one day he shows up late. And I said, hey man, where were you? He's like oh, I'm sorry. I ran behind. Well, the next day he's late. The next day he's late. Pretty soon I realize he's late all the time.
Well it's causing problems. Because I have customers. We had a home-based office. And I have customers that are supposed to be at the office at let's say 6 o'clock at night at our house. These are brides and grooms who are planing their wedding. And we had a home office. And so they would show up. And he's not on time.
So my wife is having to greet these people. And walk them into the office that was attached to the house. And it just kept happening. And so finally I had to say, hey I would really appreciate it if you would be on time. And he looked at me. And he's like, are you serious. Are you trying to tell me? You're not going to give me any grace after what I've done for you? And I realized right then for the first time that I was going to have to not focus on being liked. But I would have to focus on being respected.
And what happened was as I transitioned from going from being liked to being respected. What's funny is that he came back later. And he ultimately began to like me again after he respected me. But it was kind of like as a leader for the sense of justice you have to focus on being respected, right.
-Oh yeah. Welcome to the life of a head coach. And this was something I dealt with every one of my teams. Every year you're getting a new crop of kids that are coming onto your team. And there would be some that would like you, some that would respect you, and some the just hated you and wouldn't play.
-And you were Coach of the Year three times on the high school level, is that right?
-Was that in Oklahoma or Kansas?
-That was in Missouri.
-Missouri, OK awesome, awesome.
All right now we're moving on to point number four here. This is definiteness, definiteness of decision. Now Napoleon Hill says, "the man who waivers in his decisions shows that he is not sure of himself. He cannot lead others successfully."
And it seems like every leader that I've ever met what they do is they get all the facts. And then they act. That's like what they do. They get the facts. And then they act.
But when you started your own business I know it is hard. Because you're going, I think I have the facts. Now I'm going to go and buy that lead list, or get in the trade show, or print that book. As an entrepreneur, you took the jump later in life. When you took the jump how did you get over that desire to not make a decision? How did you get to the point where you can look at the facts and actually act?
-Well again, I think that you could have all the information that you want but still lack a confidence in moving forward. And I don't think it's knowledge that gives me confidence. I think it's the belief that I'm going to be able to function, or the belief that these facts and that I'm going to be able to incorporate these facts to move forward.
-So let's give a good example. At the [INAUDIBLE] event, he was teaching the idea that you can become a millionaire. And you're logically kind of battling that thought, right. Because you're saying I don't know how that's going to happen. I've never done that. I don't know how that's going to happen. But yet you're hearing him say it can happen. And he starts to show you examples of people who've done it, right. And at some point when did you get that belief? Was it seeing examples? Or how did you build your belief?
-I think it was probably you're there. I mean this is an intensive. You're there like 10, 11 hours a day, just hammering. And so I think that was the key thing. It was just the hammering over, and over, and over, and over of the encouragement. OK, it wasn't just the facts. You can do it. But there was also the encouragement. And then there was also seeing examples of other people being able to do it. And then there was some practical steps. And here's what you need to do. But I think gradually my belief began to grow. It wasn't just reading a book and going, oh I'm just going to go do it now. But it was actually connecting my belief with the new
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-I know one thing I do to build my belief of things is that I always read every day by reading 15 minutes of somebody who's more successful than myself, or somebody who's at a place in their life where I want to be. And so like this morning I was reading a book called, "Founder's Guide" or it was called "Founder's Work."
And it's a book about some of the top billion dollar start-ups in the world, and some of the things that they dealt with on a daily basis. And I remember reading when I was reading about Paypal, and how these guys at Paypal, they developed this software that was this online payment processing system.
-I don't think it will catch on.
-Well, yeah. He was having some issues. And it was basically losing millions of dollars a day because there was an error in the code. And I remember reading part of it where-- I think it was Reid Hoffman, the guy who now runs LinkedIn-- he says he has to go tell them, the venture capital people, he says, guys here's the great deal.
We have millions of people using Paypal every day. And they're like, awesome. He said, well, here's the bad news. If I were to take hundred dollar bills and throw them off the side of our building as fast as possible, I couldn't possibly lose as much money as we're losing, because there's an error in the code. And they're like, what?
And he said, well basically, people whoever want refunds or if there's any kind of fraud, we didn't factor that in.
-And they're just like, you know. When I read that, I thought, you know what? It is a little scary today doing this particular part of "Building the Thrive Experience." But if they went through it, I can go through it. That belief is what pulls you through.
-Yeah. Definitely. It's got to be the belief that you can get there because if you don't get the belief, then it's going to always limit you. You're limited to the measure of belief.
-Now this next one here is definiteness of plans. Definiteness of plans. Now Napoleon Hill says, "The successful leader must plan his work, and work his plan. A leader who moves by guesswork, without practical and definite plans, is comparable to a ship without a rudder.
-I remember reading that.
-Sooner or later, he will land on the rocks." Now this is something, this is something that it makes me go off. Because when I read this, I see this all the time. And here's an example.
I remember working with one business on the East Coast. And everybody who worked for this business was not successful. The owner was not successful.
But every week they'd get together and they would say, what do you guys think the best way is to market this thing? And they're all like, well-- they're not saying this part-- but based upon my lack of success, and the fact that I've never studied successful people, and I have no new ideas, here's another bad idea we could try. And then the boss would go, let's do it.
And every week these guys would go, well, why don't we try this? And they kept landing on the rocks every week. And when I talked to these guys and just had a meaningful conversation, I said, have you ever studied a company who has been successful in your industry and thought about doing what they do?
And they're all like, dear Lord, where does he, where did Jody get this idea for us?
-That is awesome. Can we hire you?
-I mean that was the idea. And so they said, what ideas do you have? And I said, what we're going to do, and I literally went and I got this book here-- "The Service Profit Chain." This is a book that the gentleman who is the head of QuikTrip gas stations, he told me about this.
But it's a case study on how Southwest Airlines, and how some of these top companies across the world grow. And I'm going, well what we're going to do here is we're going to--and I just go here. I literally just go through this book and it has all the specific diagrams and the systems of what to do to grow.
And I'm like, what we're going to do is we're going to start measuring results. And so we want to look at which areas of your marketing are generating results. And they're all like, where are you getting this information from?
-This is awesome.
-Yeah. And it was just a situation where they didn't have any definite plans, and the plans, they were always moving, loosey-goosey. And no one had any accountability.
-Do you see this in a lot of businesses, though? Am I the only one who sees this?
-I see it in a ton of businesses. And again, Clay, I think that unfortunately, even though we have the best education system on the face of the Earth, we do not train people to plan. We do not, we do not train up kids to plan even all the way through college. We don't train them up to plan.
You know, all they have to do is just get up and go to class. And everything just kind of comes to them. And so we are continually, just time after time after time, we are creating employees. We're not creating leaders. We're not creating entrepreneurs. We're creating employees because employees go to work, they show up, they get a paycheck.
-We have one gentleman who works with us who's an awesome guy. And I remember when he first started working I said, hey, I want you to find out how to build a site map for our websites. And he says, I've never built one before.
And I said, I know. So I want you to read this book called, "Get Rich Click." And I want you to read it, and implement the principles in it, and do it. And you can read it this weekend. And he says, but I've never done it.
I know. That's why I want you to read the book, to do it-- because I just wanted to see how resourceful he could be. Well he ended up coming into work on Monday, and he's like, hey, um, I know how we can implement the site map plan. Here's what we do. And he did it. And it was that confidence.
A few weeks later I said, I want you to write a sales script for this company using "Soft Selling In a Hard World." Go to page 178. And he says-- or 128. And he says, uh, oh, OK. I think I can do it-- but but a little confident, learning to plan.
And now I can give him any project at all. I could say, hey could you do this? And just boom, anything-- he knows he can plan now. So you're saying that's a huge issue you see, people just don't know how to plan.
-Well, it's a huge issue. Whether I'm doing life coaching with folks, or whether I'm doing the business coaching, the business consulting, I find it over and over. Most people don't have a real plan for their life, other than survive. I
I just was talking to somebody yesterday on the phone. And I said, well what is your goal? What is your plan? And he goes, well, I think probably my main goal is to retire. And I just-- that's what you got? Is that where you're headed? That's your goal. And he goes, yeah.
- --kind of vague.
-Yeah. I just want to retire. And he was 35.
-Here's the thing I found. It's step-by-step if someone wants to build a plan. What we have to do is we have to ask ourselves first, where do we want to go? So what is our goal? That's the question we ask ourselves, step one.
Then we ask ourselves, what are all the things we have to do to get there? What are all the steps to get there? And so one example, right now I'm in the process of building a call center for Thrive. And so I've decided-- what is the goal? Well, the goal is going to have five separate workstations, all marketing the Thrive experience to different event planners.
Well, now we got to think about, well if every room has five people, what do we need? Well, everyone needs a phone, so we're going to need five phones. And then we're going to need five computers. And then we're going to need five lists, and so on, and so on. And it keeps happening, and then it becomes, well, where do we get the lists?
So this person who I was telling you couldn't plan before, now can. They come to me, hey, I'll just go buy a list. Somebody on the team says, where are you going to get a list? And he says, I'll figure it out. And it's just that mentality though, that we can plan. But just saying, I want to be successful, what does that even mean? I want to reach all these specific groups of people, and so now I have to build a call center. I mean, it's just breaking it down to those specific action steps. Huge, huge deal.
-And so few people do that. I was just at a university. I was teaching a class at a university up in Bartlesville, Oklahoma, and we were talking. There's a handful of kids in the classroom, and we were talking about how to plan an event. And for this specific event it was planning a summer camp. And so this one guy goes, oh yeah, you do this, you do this, you do this. And I was going, OK, that's interesting. Where did you come up-- did you just come up with that idea? He's like, no, that's what I grew up doing. And so, so often people go, yeah, I can plan that. But really what they're doing is they're not creating anything new--
-They're just copying.
-They're just copying what they've done before. And if what they've done before is here, they can never get here.
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