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This episode is a business coaching course that presents different ideas for time management success.

Results-Focused Training, Tools, and Workshops from Expert Business Coaches.

Featured Coaching Excerpt - Notes & Transcript, Part 1
  • Ask Yourself: What don't I like about my health?
  • Lesson Nugget: Creating a system will help manage your time to work on the right tasks at the right time to ultimately see results.
  • Ask Yourself: What don't I like about my job, my friends, my relatives, or my salary?
  • Lesson Nugget: If you are unhappy or unappreciated, change your environment to improve your situation.
  • Recommended Reading: "The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership" Follow Them and People Will Follow You - John C. Maxwell
  • Recommended Reading: "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill is the bestselling self-help book of all time.

[MUSIC PLAYING] time management tipsvideos like pluralsight.com

-Now I'm going to read off some of the questions that you list specifically in page 28 of your book. Because when you read your book on time management and time management tips, "The Magic of Time Management", there are some questions you ask that are punishing. They are tough, they are difficult, they are questions that I honestly believe that most people never take the time to ask themselves.

So here we go. The first one is, what don't you like about your life? We talked about that. But then the second is, what don't you like about your health? Lee, why are you so adamant about that? I mean, you talked about it, but why you are you so adamant about asking-- everyone watching this need to ask themselves, what don't you like about your health? Why is it so important?

-Because I've seen it change my life. I took this course back in, I was about 30 years old. I was very disciplined, but I wasn't organized. I was disciplined. I'd get things done, but I was working late at night, taking work home, coming in on Saturday and Sundays until I learned a system of how to be working on the right things at the right time. And so all of a sudden, I start getting results.

And when I started scheduling my workouts, I got healthier. I lost 20 pounds. I was stronger. When you start to see the results of scheduling the priorities in your life, and somebody asked recently on the internet, said say one word that describes your life. And I put down-- I was the only one who had the right answer. I said complete.

CLAY CLARK: Complete.

-A lot of people said awesome, great. They're all lying because your life's not great. You know, you've got all these things. If you don't get balance or rhythm in your life, you're not spending-- you've got to have the right amount of time with your children, the right time with your wife, the right time with your health, the right time with your investments.

All this comes together to create either a pretty good life or a pretty sad life if you let one of those get away from you. If you get really rich and you lose your family, or you lose your health--

-Yeah.

-And let me you , I tell people the one thing you're going to have the biggest regret about, everybody, is if you lose your health and you could have done something about it because you just didn't think you could find the time.

-Let me ask you this question. Question number three in your book, you say, what don't you like about your job, your friends, your relatives, or your salary? I mean, that's a lot of questions and it seems pretty intense. So what do you mean by this?

-Well, in my own life, I worked for Hilton for many years and I was unhappy with-- I had one day off. I was unhappy with my boss who was not the kind of boss I enjoy.

[LAUGHTER]

-Not the kind of boss you enjoy.

-He was not a good person, he was a mean guy, yelling, screaming. So I quit. I changed my environment. I went and took another job. I got fired in that job. Took another job, got to Marriott. Had a great career for 17 years, and I got passed over and I quit again. Went to Disney. You know, I'm not going to get stuck in a place that I'm unhappy about my job, I'm not being treated, people don't appreciate me. I'm not going to stay there.

-What about your friends? You said, what don't you like about your friends? Well, that seems like a pretty tough question. What you talking about there?

-I think if most people look around, they don't have as many friends as they think they do.

CLAY CLARK: Oh.

-A friend to me is somebody if I say, Clay, Priscilla and I and the kids need to move in with you for a couple years till things work out here. And you say, no problem.

-Can I give you a boom?

[EXPLOSION]

-We'll make that happen.

-Or Clay, no questions asked. Send me a check for $50,000. I've got a little problem, don't be quick. I'll pay you back. I don't want to sign any promissory notes and all that rigmarole, get lawyers involved here. How many friends do you really have? Not too many. People, they'll scatter. You'll never hear from them again.

I was out of a job once and I thought I had a lot of friends, people didn't even return my phone calls. Because you think people are going to help you? So I have a few, and my wife has a few. We have a few. And we pay attention to those. But we don't pay attention to everybody as a friend.

-What do you mean what do you not like about your relatives? What do you mean by that?

-Well, I've got relatives who've got issues.

[LAUGHTER]

-They need money. They've got all kinds of problems. They're not taking care of their children properly. We had to get involved in this. Unemployed.

-See, for me, that was a big thing when I read your book and then also earlier on in my career when I read Napoleon Hill's book "Think and Grow Rich", and I read John Maxwell's book, "21 Laws of Leadership." I kept discovering over and over, it's so important who you choose to spend your time with.

And I noticed that I was spending time with people that weren't helping me, they weren't uplifting me, they weren't encouraging. They didn't have my back, like what you were talking about. If you called them because your car broke down, they weren't there. They weren't there to support you.

I think it's so important for anyone watching this as an action step, we need to look right now at our job, at our friends, at our relatives and our salary and ask ourselves in what areas am I not happy? And maybe I'm at a job where the job's great, but maybe I'm not bringing the effort I need to bring every day.

-Or you're making a lot of money but you don't like the job. Are you going to do this for 40 years and be out there unhappy and come in complaining all the time? And go home and have arguments with your wife because you're unhappy at work?

CLAY CLARK: Or maybe you're not the friend that you should be to those people. Or maybe they're not the friend to you they should be. But if you take the time to think about these items and you think about them, boom, boom, boom, asking yourself, what do I not like about my friends and my job? It seems like if you would take time to reflect, you'll begin to be proactive about these things, right? You're not just reacting.

-Yeah, I mean, I have 4,758 friends on Facebook.

-Oh yeah. Boom.

-But my main goal is to sell them a book.

[LAUGHTER]

-Not for them to move in with

them.

Looking for more episodes on time management tips with Lee Cockerell?

Featured Coaching Excerpt - Notes & Transcript, Part 2
  • Ask Yourself: What is the biggest problem in my personal life?
  • Lesson Nugget: To improve your current situation recognize your biggest problem, document it, and work on it until it is no longer a problem.
  • Lesson Nugget: Education and crisis are two reasons people change. Be proactive, don't wait for a crisis to force you to alter your ways.
  • Ask Yourself: What is the biggest problem in your work life?
  • Definition Magician: Autocratic-Taking no account of other people's wishes or opinions.

[MUSIC PLAYING]

-Now, what is the big-- you ask in your book, here. You say, what is the biggest problem in your personal life? Now, it seems like you're getting kind of personal here. What do you mean by that?

LEE COCKERELL: Your personal life's pretty personal, actually. And I think you've just got to reflect. You've got to be honest with yourself. Is it your marriage? Is it your children are not doing well in school? Is it your health? Are you really suffering? You got that diabetes? You're overweight?

Whatever the issue is, what is it, really? Once you say, this my biggest problem, I would tell people every day in your planner or your phone, you should have your biggest problem in there, and you should work on it every day til it goes away. Every day. And the reason people don't it, it's hard.

-Well you know, I know that-- our son was born blind back in 2007. And until that point, I was not scheduling time to take my wife on dates consistently. Or--

LEE COCKERELL: She mentioned that to me. I was surprised.

-Well, I was not doing that. That's true, I wasn't doing it. And it took though, that tragic event of some of the stuff we were dealing with my son to realize I don't even have time in my schedule to go to these appointments for his medical appointments, let alone I hadn't spent time with my wife.

And I sat down with a mentor. And I was asking him for some tips on how do I get through this situation, and what I could do to stay positive. And he said, how often are you taking your wife on a date? And when I was asking myself, I was like, I don't think I have taken her on a date for at least seven years, maybe six years. I mean, it was pretty sad.

And so, when I would ask myself what I didn't like about my personal life, if I was doing that every day, I would have honestly said, I'm not being the husband I should be. And I just think it's so important that we're asking ourselves these questions, because a lot of times by asking ourselves these questions, looking at the man in the mirror, we can begin to make some big changes, as long as we--

-Hey, listen. There's only two reasons people change. You did because you were educated by somebody who told you what you do. Or crisis. Your wife leaves you or you're having a lot of arguments. Education or crisis. And hopefully this is education, so some people are going to change. Some people are going to change eventually because of crisis.

I mean, I changed towards my own wife. She almost died in '08 or '09. I took care of her for almost two years. Ended up with depression. I told her after, I said, Priscilla, I used to love you. Now, I'm madly in love with you. I thought you were going to die.

You know, a crisis, it shakes you up and puts you in another place. And hopefully most people get ahead of it. Don't end up changing because of a crisis. After the divorce, you become a better person. Or after your kids are in the drug rehab, you start paying more attention to them. Or this--

CLAY CLARK: We encourage y you, if you're watching this, right now, to create that sense of urgency, right now. Don't wait for it to get bad with your health or your finances or your marriage or whatever that situation is. Go ahead, right now, and ask yourself these questions.

I know in your book you said, the next question is what is the biggest problem in your work life? What are you talking about there?

-Well, you know, when I was at Hilton, my biggest problem in my work life was my boss and one day a week off, Thursdays. So I had no home life. It was out of control. It wasn't great. My wife wasn't happy about it.

Maybe it's a project. The biggest problem in your business life is a project you've been putting off because you don't know how to do it. So, it's really important, and it's vital, and your boss is going to bite you one day because you haven't done it. And you don't know how to go out and get other people to help you and get started.

-It might be an uncomfortable question for you, but I want to ask you, because you've been in business for a long time. Was there ever a time in your career where you think back upon yourself and your own career where you said that you were your own biggest problem in your work life? I mean, did you ever have a character flaw, or some issue, where you were like this is definitely limiting my work life and my career?

-And it did. I was autocratic. I was so organized that I abused people. I used my authority in the wrong way. I intimidated people, so they got their job done. I got a lot done. But I'm sure if I was in the middle of the street, they would have run over me. On purpose.

And I was that way. And it was it was going to affect my long-term career because you don't get promoted and you don't get into higher level positions if you're autocratic, and pushing people around, and scaring people, and not treating people respectfully. And I had to learn that lesson. But it was 15 years into my career where I went through kind of a tough time.

-Pretend that I'm a third grader doing life here, running a business or starting in a career. What do you mean by autocratic? Just so I get that.

-I think if when I pull in the parking lot and everybody's running away from my car in the morning, that's probably a bad sign.

-Called Darth Vader action, there.

-If nobody wants to come tell me the truth because I overreact, or I don't want to hear it, or I tell them just go do your job. Autocratic. And it's like parents, you don't ever want to scare your kids, you want them to feel safe.

I want people at work to feel safe. So then, they can give you 150%. If they're always worrying about how to deal with you, and manipulating you, and--

-Darth Vader was tough to work with. You always worried he was going choke you, or kill you, or whip out the lightsaber.

-They all get it in the end. All those kind of people get it in the end.

Featured Coaching Excerpt - Notes & Transcript, Part 3
  • Ask Yourself: What am I going to do about it?
  • Lesson Nugget: You don't find time, you make it. Schedule when you are going to spend time on your priorities.
  • Notable Quotable: "If you don't pay attention to your wife, her new husband will enjoy your home."
  • Notable Quotable: "If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right." - Henry Ford (Founder of the Ford Motor Co.)
  • Notable Quotable: "You pay now or you pay later in life."

[MUSIC PLAYING]

-Now, I want to ask you this, here. The final question you ask on page 28 of your book there is you say, what are you going to do about it? I mean, so you ask yourself these questions, but then it's what are you going to do about it? What do you mean by that the question?

-Well, it's like me, and what am I going to do about getting stronger and being in better shape as I get older? I signed up for and fought for five years I've been seeing this guy. I signed up. I pay him in advance, so I have to go. I have an appointment, nine o'clock, Tuesday and Friday.

-This is your trainer.

-Yeah. And what are you going to do? I see my internist twice a year. I schedule both of those. I see my urologist twice a year. I schedule those. I see my dentist twice a year. I schedule those. I'm not going to get a tooth infection, it goes down and gets-- you know, and then have to have your teeth replaced. You talk-- you pay now or you pay later in life. You either pay attention to your kids back here or you visit them in rehab or you take them lunch up to the prison. You know, you pay or you pay.

-And it's not that you're mean, you're just being practical here. You're just saying if you don't do this, this is going to happen.

-Absolutely. You don't pay attention to your family and your wife, her new husband will enjoy your home.

-Here we go. Now that's such a notable quotable. If you don't pay attention to your wife, her new husband will enjoy your home. OK. Now over the years, Lee, as I've worked with thousands of entrepreneurs, I have always encouraged them to think about their goals in terms of spirit, mind, body, relationships, and finances. Again thinking about their whole life asking themselves, what are my goals for spirit, mind, body, relationships, finances. Trying to think pretty holistically there. What areas would you recommend thrivers should focus on? Or do you focus on--

-Mine are basically my health, my family, and my finances.

-Your health, and your family, and your finances.

-And my wife says that's good, Lee. I don't care. And it's really health, family, back and forth, because she said if you don't take yourself, Lee, you can't take care of us. And I think that's a good quote and it's right. And you won't be there for your family.

And An finances, if you don't make money and do well, you can't take care your family. And you can't take care of giving to non-profits. And you can't take care of helping other people or homeless. When you make a lot of money, you can give a homeless guy $20 instead of $1. So he can get a couple beers and a sandwich.

So, that's what I think about it. There's certain things people say, oh money doesn't make you happy. Well that's a good quote, but I don't know who said that.

-Well, you're certainly happier with a little bit of extra money.

-Absolutely.

-Now I've heard you say this notable quotable where you say, make time for what matters. You will never find the time. Make time for what matters. You will never find the time.

-You hear people say this all the time. They say, I'm going to start exercise as soon as I find time. Oh, really. You and I and Albert Einstein have 160 hours a week. You're not going to find any extra time, not one second.

You're going to get as much as I have. We're all a level playing field with time, maybe not money, but on this. And you have to make time for what's important.

You don't find time to work out. You make time. You schedule it. You don't find time to work on your retirement plan. You schedule a meeting with an adviser and you go see him and you do what it tells you. You don't find time to spend with your children. You make time. You schedule for Saturday morning to go spend some time with them.

-I've talked with countless thrivers so far who are on the website, who have told us just by carving out 15 minutes a day, just 15 minutes, they've been able to learn stuff that's helped them change their lives.

Yeah, we have one lady who has been able to almost double her business this year. Another guy I talked to today. He's been able to go from being a school teacher to being a very, very successful entrepreneur, just by scheduling that time for 15 minutes a day to learn.

What would you say to the person who says, I can't find 15 minutes a day to learn, I just don't have the time? I just can't find-- what would you say to that person?

-I would say they fall into this category of cant-do attitude. The problem is with those can't-do-- we're going to talk about them, I think, a little bit, but-- can't-do people actually believe their excuses. They believe it!

I need to hire people who believe they can change, and they do have impact, and don't underestimate what you can do in life, and raise the expectations for yourself, and for your people, and raise your expectations. But it can't be personal, w well, it's my mother's fault, there's no jobs around, you can't make any money, that blah blah.

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