Learn how to change your mindset to help you push through adversity and reach your goals.Sign Up to Watch
university of phoenix for entrepreneurs, alternatives to lynda.com
-Hey, Thrivers. This is Daniel McKenna, and today we're sitting with Caleb Taylor and Clay Clarkon Thrive15.com, one of the alternatives to lynda.com , and we are going to be talking about how nobody cares more about your success than you. We will teach you how to get into the mindset for achieving success by helping you realize that the only person that is going to bring you success is yourself. So let's hop right into this lesson and change that mindset. Let's go.
-Hey, how you doing, my friend?
-I'm doing great. I was watching some of the guys editing, you know, today. I was looking at it, and I was realizing like people are not-- we have thousands of people all around the world who are logging on to learn about how to grow business, or start a business, or advance in their career. And I'm realizing they're not logging on for my physical beauty. It just occurred to me that that's not the reason. People have been lying to me.
-You've been feeding me this line of bull for months now. And I just realized that can't be true.
-I was trying to, you know, you pad your ego, you're trying to build you up a little bit. I want you to still come and not feeling embarrassed.
-I realized what I look like, though, and I'm like, well, people are here for other reasons.
-One thing to try is maybe get a tan.
-Maybe try getting a tan.
-Just putting it out there, it's on the table. Do what you want.
-Today we are talking about the fact that nobody cares more about your success than you. Nobody cares more about your success than you. Why is this important to dedicate a whole episode to?
-This punched in the face when I started to realize this knowledge, when I started getting out of college. That every day that I struggled, no one was going to call me and encourage me. I remember as a kid, you know, I'd screw up, I'd fall off my bike, I'd do bad at spelling, and my mom would say, hey you can do it. You can make it. Or my dad, or maybe some of you watching didn't have a mom or a dad. But at a certain point, I realized I'm going to have to encourage myself. Like nobody cares. If my business fails, or if I do poorly in my career, nobody's going to call and encourage me.
-I kept waiting for somebody else to come and help me. Kept waiting for the reinforcements to come.
-So, you have to establish your own success.
-Whatever that is. Whether you're in your job right now, wanting to start a job. Whatever it is, you've gotta established that yourself.
-Yeah. One thing I love is the New York Times actually did a book review on the book The Millionaire Next Door. They said 80% of millionaires and business mentors are first generation affluent who never received inheritance.
CLAY CLARK: Yeah.
-So they weren't handed anything. And lots of times it's easy for anybody, those of us who aren't necessarily where we want to be financially, to say well they got handed to them.
-Well, because you're watching the Kardashians and you're watching the shows about the reality shows.
-Well, that's not the fact.
-Yeah, the reality is 80% of people in our country who have done well, and if you're not watching from America, and we have people all over the world, if you're watching in Ukraine right now, what up! But here's the deal. It's like, you can become successful, but the reality is 4 out of 5 people who do become successful are self-made. And you can be one of those 4 out of 5
-So you're saying, if you do you want to be one of those four or five people, you know, that have achieved some their goals financially. I believe you're going probably have to do some things that they do. Right?
-Yeah. And I guess, the thing is that success is hard. And the great thing about success is, when you have success, if you want to have a big success or you want to achieve big, big goals, you want to have an abnormal lifestyle of wealth. It's not normal. So you're going to have to embrace that concept. You're going to have to put forth a different kind of level of intensity and effort to get there.
-So here's something that's interesting, though. Entrepreneur Magazine said that 86% of wealthy people, and they define wealthy people as anyone earning at least $160,000 annually and holding at least $3.2 million in assets, that's how they define wealthy. So 86% of wealthy people love to read. However, only 26% of poor people love to read. Is that a coincidence? Or, is there something to that?
-I noticed for me, when I first started reading and started, I mean, it's crazy but a lot of men, I was one of these guys. I would go to work and to my boss and would say could you practice your sales over the weekend? Could you practice your customer service? Could you read the manual over the weekend?
-And I would be like I don't have time for that. I've got to watch, and I remember specifically, I was watching like every football game that they had on Monday Night Football back in the day when it was on regular network TV. I had to watch every Monday Night Football. And I had to get together with the dudes during a certain night. And on Friday night I had to go out with--, and on Saturday I to--. I had no time because I had to say yes to all those obligations.
-Clay, this is getting offensive.
-And so I had to start to say no. I started to say no. People were like, dude, how come you don't come out anymore? And I'm like, because I'm studying success. And so I would just say when you start to study success, and read success books, you'll start to notice you get paid more. And that makes you kind of like it.
-So you're saying nobody cares about your success as much as you do.
-And it seems like this top percent of wealthy people understand that. That's why they invest so much in their own education. Is that what you're, that's how this statistic fits in?
-Yeah. It's just the thing of like if you're going to become successful, you're going to start to care more about your success than anybody else. You're going to have to just own it and say I am going to be successful. And I have decided. I made that decision. You have to dominate and own that
Find the top alternatives to lynda.com. Thrive15.com provides business training for entrepreneurs.
-So I've got a notable quotable here. This is from Napoleon Hill. He says, "the starting point of all achievement is desire. Keep this constantly in mind. Weak desire brings weak results, just as a small fire makes a small amount of heat." Unpack that for us a little bit here.
-Can I offend people? Is that OK?
-I would prefer you not to.
-If you say, like, in all due--
-I do not give you permission.
-If I say in all due respect, I can pretty much after that say whatever I want. So I'm going to say that. With all due respect, check this story.
I remember at college, I remember seeing my wife, at the time she wasn't my wife. She was a girl, you know, on the campus. I remember thinking, she is so hot, so hot.
I have to-- I'm not sure what to do, but I'm going to catch her. I'm going to get her. I'm going to bring her back to my-- I'm going to, you know, I'm going to win this. I mean win her.
And I remember that my buddy Jake, he says to me, dude, she's out of your league. And I'm like, I know. But geez, I'm telling you.
And so then I start-- check it out, though. Once we started kind of-- I got rejected. She told me no. So I come back. And I'm like, maybe she just wants more information.
-That's what you hear.
-Because I had the desire that was required to win this lady.
-Ooh. I gotcha.
-I straight up showed up. She was babysitting at someone's house.
-I showed up. I'm making like omelets. I'm like, just-- I'm like trying to wow her, only to discover she hates my cooking, hates my food. Rejection number two, bro.
-Wow. Two rejections.
-I move in for that kiss action, no go. So I come back, opportunity number three. The average man would not have come back for the third.
-But your desire.
-But my desire, I had the desire required to woo the lady. So I kept coming back, keep coming back. Boom. Next thing you know, I'm getting married to a lady who's totally better than me in every single possible way. I just-- she's awesome.
-We all agree with you there.
-You know what I mean? So I am just telling you, though. And then once we started dating-- keep focused here. This is what I'm saying.
Once we start dating, we start doing that deal where you're kind of calling each other at 4:00 in the morning going, what are you doing? I don't know. What are you doing?
-You hang up.
-What are you doing? No, I just-- You doing all right, babe? Did you get that email, babe? And you're just talking.
I didn't sleep for like a year. I'm pretty positive that scientifically it's impossible to not sleep for a year. But I didn't sleep for a year, because I could make out with her till 4:00 in the morning and then get up for class at 6:00 and I was still on fire, because I had the desire. Does that make sense?
-Yeah. It makes sense.
-And that was-- I'm glad that you got so passionate, because this is--
-This is intense.
-It got deep, bro.
-But we got to see some of that desire and that passion just come through right there.
-That's why as soon as this episode's done, I'm sprinting home to hit on my wife.
-OK. Well, let's go ahead and slow down, because we're not done here.
-What we're going to be doing is we're going over these two different points, two different principles here. This is all to help you realize that nobody cares about your success as much as you. OK?
The first thing we're touching on is, come to the realization that the cavalry is not coming any time soon. That's tough to hear. But it's real. Come to that realization. The second one we're going to touch on is coming to grips with the reality of the law of cause and effect. OK?
-So let's start with the first one. The cavalry isn't coming any time soon. All right. I've got a notable quotable here.
-All right. So this is a notable quotable from Walt Disney. He kind of started a successful company, didn't he?
-He did a few things that people thought were all right.
-He was all right.
-You might have heard of him.
-Like, whatever. All right.
-You might have heard of the mouse, any of those things. That's him. He says, "all our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them." OK. Why do you need courage? Because you're scared, right?
-Because my wife was hot. And I could not have-- I mean, look at me. I am not America's standard for beauty.
-But I knew that I wanted to get her. I wanted to catch her. I wanted to marry her. I wanted to bring her home, bring her back to my castle, the whole deal.
-So your dreams can be scary, though.
-It was scary, because she's so hot.
-Yeah. And nobody's going to help you.
-And your business goals are so big and you want to be an awesome mom.
-You want to be an awesome mom. You want to be an awesome dad. You want to have an awesome house. You want to have health insurance. You want to have-- you want to be successful. And that's not normal. Most people are not successful.
-Right. Well, tell us though, when you first started out, you were doing cold-calling in the early days. This was after Target, after some of the other jobs. You were doing cold- calling.
And I think I remember you telling me a little bit of kind of this false belief, you know, that you had about cold-calling. How does that relate? Tell us about that a little bit.
-OK. The top insurance agent-- I worked with insurance companies. So I helped them train their agents. Specifically, I worked with Farmers Insurance for a long time. Perhaps you've seen their commercials.
-We are farmers, buh buh buh, buh buh buh bum. Those guys. I worked with those guys.
I start realizing the top agent, though, the top, the guy who's the best of the best of the best, he converts roughly 1.7% of all of the people he talks to into a deal. I mean, he makes--
-The best of the best.
-Meaning he makes 100 cold calls and he books 1.7 deals. That's his office average.
-And you start to realize that Steve Jobs pitched to over 100 and something venture capital firms and they all said no three times. But one guy, Markkula, Mike Markkula-- I believe I'm saying that right. We'll put it up on the screen here. But Mike invested in Steve Jobs. And that's what made it work.
So when I got rejected, I started to realize-- like I say, I'm digging for gold. And I'm getting farther and farther down through the soil. And I'm eventually going to find it instead of getting discouraged that I haven't found it yet.
-So how does this apply though to what we're talking about, where the cavalry is not coming? How does that apply?
-You have to realize that there's nobody coming to say, you can do it. All right. You're on the way. You're close to gold. You're three feet from gold. Don't stop.
But if you can say that to yourself, now you have a powerful thing. And I will tell you, I've interviewed countless millionaires and mentors. And all of them talk to themself. What do you mean talk to themself? I mean, they tell themselves, you can do it. You're almost there. You're getting there. You're getting closer.
-OK. But in actuality, do you really talk to yourself? What does that look like?
-I do all the time, bro.
-OK. So if I'm a Thriver here. I'm watching on the other side of this camera. What do you say to me in that regard?
-OK. Just being honest, rough, rough example today. I have a double sinus infection. And I got the double ear infection going on. And I have fluid on my lungs. It's like a neat deal.
-Yeah. That is pretty cool.
-I'm like a medical anomaly.
-So I wake up this morning and I feel awful. And literally when I breathe I kind of hear it wheeze a little bit. And I'm kind of deaf in one ear. It's weird.
And I told myself this morning. I said, it is a great day. And I am too blessed to be stressed. I'm excited about today. I'm going to have a great day today. I am pumped.
And I listened to One Republic. If I Lose Myself on my groove shark on the way in. And I was pumped. Got the subwoofer cranked up. Get out of my Hummer of love. Hop in the meeting.
You'd have no idea I had a rough morning. But I had a rough morning because I feel physically bad. But I have to encourage myself to tell myself that I do not feel like that.
-That's cause the cavalry's not coming.
-The cavalry's not coming. They're not going to come help me.
-OK. We got principle number 2 here now. OK. Principle number 2. The law of cause and effect. All right.
We have a little dictionary definition here. Are you ready for it?
-Dictionary definition. Cause and effect is noting a relationship between actions or events such that one or more are the results of the other or others.
What is cause and effect?
-Let me show you real quick. If it's OK if I go to my-- if I go to my incredible board of--
-Let me just show you this real quick.
-Cause and effect. What is it?
-If this is a seed right here. This is a seed, OK. And I have soil. And I till the soil. Right.
-And I put the seed. Step one is I till. Step two is I sow. Step three is I want to water that beast. Right? Step four is I want to keep watering that beast. Step five. I keep watering. The point is I keep watering.
Then I eventually have a harvest. Let's make sure with our lives that we are one, tilling the soil. Two. Let's make sure we're sowing seeds. Three. Let's make sure we're consistently watering. And then let's talk about a harvest.
-So how does this fit with the cause and effect?
-Well, the thing is in business, right now, if you're being a slug of an employee, if you're not bringing it every day, if you're not over-delivering, if you're not wowing the boss, if you're not wowing customers, if you're not reading self-help, if you're not studying self-help, if you're not devoted to being awesome, you have not tilled the soil.
And then if you did till the soil, you're that crazy guy who is working like that. You are dominating. You are doing the six-day principal. You're working hard. You're over delivering. You're bringing that mindset to the office.
Then you gotta water that. You don't get a merit badge or a cookie because you've been working hard for 30 days in a row, or 60 days in a row. I'm talking about getting it done week after week, month after month. And I will tell you, after you've been doing that about six months, people will start to say, wow. That's a diligent person. Wow. That's somebody who's a hard worker.
Now people want to start to talk to you about maybe getting promoted, maybe advancing. But you've got to understand the law of cause and effect. You can't just get the effect because you want it. You have to make sure you are the cause of the effect you want.
-OK. So what do I do with this now? You've explained to me what cause and effect is. Practically, what do I do with this cause and effect?
-Look at your job right now and ask yourself, are you truly performing at a level that is 15% better than what you're asked to do? So real, real talk. If you're a server working in a restaurant, if you're in a call center, if you're working in sales, you're replacing mufflers, ask yourself. Are you working at a level that's 15% better than what is expected?
Because if you do not, you're not sowing seeds. If all you're doing is meeting their expectations, you are not sowing seeds. If all you're doing is just getting the job done, you are not sowing seeds.
I'm talking about you have to over deliver consistently. That is sowing seeds. And watering it is doing it day after day.
Diligence, remember the word diligence, means the steady application of effort. The steady, consistent, application of effort.
Send us your email address, and our team of elite minds will get right on it.